I feel better after a really long nap of two hours after I studied for a while in the morning. Emotional breakdowns really do sap my energy away, I couldn't help the lethargy after the reflection on what I read, and I guess I just needed to rest.
I shall not give up, nor give in to the want to just drop everything and move on. but I shall also not invest too much of my feelings and expectations also. Expectations are really bothersome no? But to tell the truth, I was really quite hurt after I read those words of yours. It's like I really wanted to help, but it turned out wrong on your side, and I guess I was feeling hurt that I couldn't do anything to help and that I was a burden instead. But at times, I really just want to ask you if I do mean anything to you. I know you'll probably won't answer, cause it's not in your character to do so, but somehow, just now, I just really wanted to know if I mattered to you.
But even if I get no answers, I will just smile as He gives me reason to, and just do whatever He wants me to. :)
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